Sorry but we need to interrupt this post with this latest news update:

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All the News for all that's Cute

CWC NEWS UPDATE

Leading article: The birth of “HOT MAN FLESH” or New Culty Holiday

We here in the CWC News room would like David the Hot Man Flesh to know that there are few days in a person’s life that is more important than their birthday, it is a celebration of when a person came into the world and the contributions that person has made.

So ever since appearing half naked, willing to show a bunch of inexperienced Cultys and crazy cat ladies what real Hot Man Flesh was all the while holding a cuddly little stuffed animal, ever so seductively, in just the right spot to peek our curiosity, your birth has also come to mean the GREATEST DAY of the YEAR for every CWC Cult member!  

David your birthday is not only a celebration of your contributions to the lonely and fairly often horny Cultys, but more a celebration of who you are *…Alphie…Al…David…Dave…Hot Man Flesh…?...ok anyway…* and a chance to say, “HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAVID life would not be the same without your *unseen* smile, *unheard* laugh, *hard to convey over the internet* love, and/or your *dear sweet jesus we hope he gets that teleporter fixed* support!”

Most people get a birthday card on their birthday, but not you David! – YOU…get US!

Happy Birthday DAVID from around the WORLD -

"Zhu ni sheng ri kuai le" in Mandarin Chinese, "Lang zal hij/zij leven" in Dutch, "Õnne soovime Sul" in Estonian, "Zum Geburtstag Viel Glück" in German, "Nα ζήσεις και χρόνια πολλά " in Greek, "Que los cumplas feliz" or "Feliz cumpleaños a tí" in Spanish, "Parabéns a você" in Portuguese, "Maligayang Bati" in Filipino, "Sto lat" in Polish, "Lá Bhreithe Shona Duit" in Irish, "Ja ma du leva" or "Med en enkel tulipan" in Swedish,"Joyeux Anniversaire" or "Bonne Fête" in French, "Tanti Auguri a te" in Italian and "Iyi ki dogdun, Mutlu Yillar Sana" in Turkish.

*I hope these say Happy Birthday!?*

Lor Blitzer Signing Off

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All the News for all that's Cute - CWC NEWS UPDATE

WHAT DO GREAT LEADERS DO DIFFRENTLY or SHOULD TODAY BE AN INTERNATIONAL HOLIDAY?

They came, they saw, they caved move: That is exactly what Culty’s across the world did when our beloved m’Lord *KICKED US OFF HIS SITE* grew weary of Culty’s constant chatter on his most popular site CWC. 

Enter Deb/Elmoo who thoughtfully created a site that would bring together followers of the All Mighty God of Cute…with…Chris…anyway - Cultyier’s are bowing down to the draftswoman of CULTY!  For today is HER day – HER BIRTHDAY – THE GREATEST DAY EVER!

What's the difference between a leader that is great and one that is…well…not…DEB/ELMOO that's what!

Let us take a look: 

GREAT LEADERS SHOW UP A LOT

Daily Topic 11/16 Elmooo – 11/14 Elmooo – 11/11 + 12 + 13 Elmooo – 11/4 Elmooo – 11/1 + 2 Elmoo – 10/31 Elmooo…etc...do I need to say more! *yes*

By showing up on the Culty site a lot, Deb/Elmoo, gets the opportunity to share her ideas about the direction and purpose of the Cult.

“Obviously I get things done. I'm running a family of four and a message board of obsessed Cult members. Oh...and I promise not to kill you, or harm you in any way and i realize how nutz this is....but i've never minded cleaning toilets.”

GREAT LEADERS MANAGE PERFORMANCE

Deb makes sure she models the behavior she wants for the Cult to follow, she practices leadership by example.

“Damn!!!  What will he give me for a 2 and 5 year old?!?! They gotta be worth something right…”

GREAT LEADERS CRITIQUE THEIR OWN LEADERSHIP PERFORMANCE

“I don't think I could get any less done today if I were duct taped to my couch.  I don't know what my deal is, but man I've just done NOTHING today!  I'm like a giant slug.”

MOST OF ALL GREAT LEADERS ALWAYS KEEP THEIR COOL

“OMC!!!  I had to do this because HOLY SHIT!!! How the hell did Chris know it's almost my birthday?!?!?! I got a T-shirt in the mail today!!! The package and note say Happy Birthday Deb. WTF?!?!  So I wasn't going to really say anything...I guessing you probably knew anyway...... So are you all behind this?!?!  This is EFFING AWESOME!!!!
I'll take pics soon! happy, happy, happy, happy, happy......best birthday ever, and it aint even here yet.!” 

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CWC NEWS UPDATE

Christmas and New Year Edition

FIRES, QUAKES, WAR and “oh ya” MERRY CHRISTMAS & Happy New Year

Being a hard seasoned reporter isn’t always easy, looking for that next big story around every corner and in every conversation, always asking the “hard” questions, but this holiday I was a little overwhelmed by the ferociousness of this year’s “Yuletide” offerings.  

“Hello, Merry Christmas…” I offer.  “Hey did you hear about the one man and two teens that gang-raped a woman in San Francisco…” is all that is said as they hurry off to do more shopping “…have a great Christmas…” is suggested as an after thought.

I am not going to let one Scrooge spoil my festive cheer, “Happy Holiday’s!” I greet the  next passerby.  “Did you hear that story of the teen bought in Egypt and brought to California to clean some lady’s house!”  “You’re kidding right…” I say, not sure if I mean about the story or the seasons greeting.

Now, I don’t know if it is the state of the economy: Headline; ‘Granny Robber’ 68 –year old is the suspect of several bank heists, she was trying to support her grown son who had fallen on hard times.

Or is it the war in…where is it now…Iraq…?: Headlines; ‘Viagra Helping CIA Win Afghan Friends’, oh, will we stop at nothing to win this war.

Possibly the devastating condition of our environment: Headlines; ‘Coral growth in decline’ ‘Rising Seas, Carbon Trade Game, The Greenhouse Effect, The Cooling of the Planet,  Melting Mountains,’  and on and on and on they go until News media’s  have whole sections dedicated to the declining environment

Perhaps it was the lack of Christmas spirit made evident in the indignant reaction of some shoppers to the trampling of a holiday employee of Wal-Mart, that made me aware of the tone to this seasons holiday greetings.

As my “New Year Resolution” I vow to see the world through rose colored glasses, to always believe my glass is half full, to always look on the bright side, to always make snow angels in the snow, even if I get a penalty, never pee on someone’s leg, tell them it’s raining, always to be happy, cheerful, to always and forever watch cutewithchris.com.

So, from me to you “MERRY CHRISTMAS *Happy New Year* to All *and Al* and to all *your dreams are dead* a good night!”

Lor Blitzer signing off

CULTY NEWS

ALL THE NEWS ALL THE TIME *…well sometimes…*

GOING GOING…gone?...but not forgotten? Culty Decline 2009

   OR

Old people are old and make me laugh!

Friend of Culty, anti-stupid activist and Culty member MK, recently posted on the ALL KNOWING VAST MACHICE…aka…”internet” that membership activity was down on the, once filled to overflowing, Culty site.  There has been as little as ONE post per day echoes most of the original Culty members!

For those of you who don’t know and those who have forgotten, Culty is a place to discuss and worship internet superstar Chris Leavins, and his weekly show Cute with Chris - www.cutewithchris.com .

Was the ALL KNOWING VAST MACHINE…refer to paragraph one for definition…trying to block Cult members from posting, perhaps, by making Cult member’s type extra words only to frustrate them off the site or by using hypnosis to make them forget their log in and password!

Maybe the “Grid” is trying to block members from taking part in secluded events, by hosting Cult events in distant and far off lands such as “Los Angeles” and the mystical holy land of “Toronto”.                    Most members live to far away to attend these “so-called” events*…and/or are too lazy and forgetful to attend...anyway…

…this seasoned reporter thinks that the “VAKM” maybe using internet videos to craft false scenarios and lies about Cult Members to force us on to other sites and/ or worse OFF THE INTERNET! The best defense for Cult Members is to take out their Polaroid’s and gets still images of these offenses…thousands of them. If this proves too difficult use extra photos and paste them together creating scenarios of you under attach, to support charges of criminal conspiracy by the “VAKM” – you know “they’d” do the same!...ok anyway…*

I spoke with veteran cult member MK,  practicly practically the smartest one out of the bunch, about why cult activity was in decline?

“Life goes on” is what Cult member MK had to say responding with superior knowledge and charm on the Decline of Culty 2009!

There is light, however small at the end of the Culty tunnel with the introduction and release of “The Captain”!

This long awaited release has sparked a wave of “Guest Visitor’s” to Culty.  Is this ”Written Word” a new way for Cult members to hear the message of a GOD *…once again that’s –Chris Leavins, and his weekly show Cute With Chris,  www.cutewithchris.com...*  Will the return of good old fashion reading be the “new” NATION OF CULTY! Only time on the internet will tell!

Lor Blitzer signing off

CULTY NEWS

ALL THE NEWS ALL THE TIME *…well sometimes…*

SANTA buys in a down market

   OR

Doesn’t everyone own a SANTA suit?

It has recently come to the attention of this News room that seasoned CWC Cult member MK maybe the one and only SANTA Claus!

Millions of Cult members around the world are secretly posting their wishes on the highly active Cult guest site Culty, a place to discuss and worship internet superstar Chris Leavins, and his weekly show Cute with Chris. www.cutewithchris.com, to see if their wishes really come true!   

Asking the hard questions this reporter was able to find out these astonishing facts that seem to link our own MK to SANTA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The following are just some of the true facts in this “wish list” of a case:

December 25 arrives around the time of the winter solstice, when the days get shorter and the sun seems to be fading.  It was also the "birthday" of the Persian sun-god known as Mithras ("born" from a rocK, he is known as the "rock-born god"), originally one of the lesser demigods of the Zoroastrian religion.  MK – as in MK is as smart as a ROCK – I mean hard as…ya…hard as - Proving MK is a god.

Ok now we know that MK is a god like Chris: “thou shall have no other cute man/boy sarcastic earth gods before me, except SANTA” (CWC Chris Leavins www.cutewithchris.com)

Millions of boys and girls each year wait with expectancy and patience for the glorious appearing of the great Santa-god.

...And children WORSHIP Santa and Cult members are LIKE children and SANTA is worshipped and loved by thousands of children the world around!

Recently Cult member MK was noted to have been heard commanding his troops into gift giving action,

CULTY member MK aka SANTA, “Now, Dasher! Now, Dancer! Now, Prancer, and Vixen!
"On, Comet! On, Cupid! On, Donner and Blitzen! And of course, Rudolph.”

Proof enough for me!

Lor Blitzer signing